When it comes to matters of religion, I try to be very open-minded. While I tend to be more spiritual and against organized religion, I understand that some people need that level of hierarchy and dogma even if I personally find dogmatic ideology to be unhealthy. The last year I have spent a lot of time in Muslim countries. In fact, I have found myself living in Muslim countries for more than half of the last year.
And it hasn’t been easy.
I know many Americans are convinced every Muslim alive wants nothing more than to brutally murder and torture every living, breathing American, but that’s total crap, and it wasn’t what made it hard to live in these countries.
In fact, people tended to be quite pleased and excited that Americans were visiting their country. I had the most interesting discussion with a Moroccan man during the final days of the US election which would decide if Obama was reelected.
Most of the people we met lived up to traditional Muslim hospitality.
I have studied Islam, including having read the Koran. I have had several discussions with many of its followers. Generally speaking those conversations have been respectful of other beliefs.
Some have been quite challenging for me to keep my mouth shut. For example, hearing how previously unmarried women in Morocco have to have their virginity certified by a physician as part of the marriage licensing procedure had me steaming. Many women save up hard-earned money so they can have surgical procedures that will “restore their virginity” for the examination.
I had a fascinating discussion with a man who explained how he felt bad for Western women who were horribly disrespected by a society that belittles women and uses their sexuality as a means to sell products.
It was extremely interesting hearing his perspective, and it did make me stop and think.
I have done my best to defend Islam in the past, especially after the events of 9/11. These Muslims were not an accurate representation of Islam I argued. Fundamentalists of any religion are a world unto themselves.
But I have to say Islam is not helping me! The more time I’ve spent in Muslim countries, the more frustrated I have become with the hypocrisy of its followers.
Recently in Morocco, three teenagers were arrested for kissing. Two of the teens were photographed by a friend while their lips touched. The photo was then shared on Facebook which prompted their arrest for “indecency.”
While in Yemen a father burned his 15-year-old daughter, killing her, after she made contact with her fiance.
In the seaside town of Essaouira, Morocco, I marveled how men would come up onto the beach and strip down to their underwear, which were usually either briefs or bikini briefs, before jumping into the ocean. As they left the water, the wet fabric clinging to their bodies left nothing to the imagination. Yet nearby a woman stood at the water’s edge clothed head to foot while her naked children frolicked in the sea.
If the idea of women covering themselves is truly about decency and respect, why are the men allowed to be practically naked in public? It is often said that a woman must cover herself to avoid tempting the man, but it is beyond medieval to believe that a woman will see a practically nude man and have no impure thoughts.
And really, that’s what it comes down to. Much of the Muslim culture towards women is medieval or even more antique.
I am having a harder time respecting a religion that is interpreted in such a way as to allow for the imprisonment of a woman for being the victim of rape.
While visiting mosques in Malaysia, I had to wear a robe since my shorts didn’t cover enough of my legs. Spending just a few hours in that garb was awful, and it made me even sadder for the women who are forced, either by law or societal expectations, to cover up. While I was dying in the humid heat while clothed in shorts and a T-shirt, I saw many women walking around in the full-length niqab, only their hands and a small section around their eyes being uncovered. Some women even wore gloves to cover their hands. Meanwhile their husband was significantly cooler in his shorts and tank top.
While homosexuality is generally punishable by imprisonment, it is often also a death sentence. Yet, a blind eye is turned to the activities in the hamam. Men having sex with boys is generally ignored.
In Afghanistan, the bacha bazi are just one of those cultural things that is accepted. It’s okay to dress up a boy in female attire, train him to sing and dance like a woman, and use him as a lover, but woman don’t you dare show your face! That is indecent!
Plenty of religions have their scriptures disrespected or offensive cartoons made of their leaders, but only yours seems to take things to the extreme of riots and murder. Tell me again how that fits into a religion of peace?
I have reached a point where my respect for cultural differences has been exhausted in this regard. The excuse that the culture is protecting the dignity of women is utter bullshit. It is a form of patriarchal control. When animals are treated better than women, there is a significant problem, and it can’t be blamed on religion, a sacred book, or its prophet.
It comes down to severe misogyny and disguised depravity. It is a culture that cares only what the men want and believe, and it’s just plain wrong.
Islam, I want to believe the best about you, but you are making it awfully difficult these days.
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